Office Space

My office has no windows, so much of the time I work with my door open to the hallway to prevent going insane from lack of natural light. (There's a window in the hallway across from my door.) Most of the time this is fine, but I occasionally close it when the psychiatry patients from down the hall get a little crazy (literally). I also close it when I've gotten a few too many "lost" people who seem to think that I am the information desk. My office is on the 2nd floor, so it's not like I'm right by the main entrance or anything. But I do work in an incredibly confusing building, where the 1st floor is the only one that really connects all the way around. So many people come up to the 2nd floor only to realize that they have to go back down to the 1st floor, down the hall, then up again to the 2nd floor on the other side of the building. It's confusing. I admit it.

But the truth is - I'm not the information desk. Additionally, other than being able to interpret the locations of room numbers, I do not know enough of the enormous building to give any info about the whereabouts of anything that I do not have personal interaction with. So this brings to me today's visitors...

Man #1: Excuse me, do you know where the laboratory is?

Me: Um, what laboratory?

Man #1: Um...the laboratory?

Me: Um, a psychiatry lab? A research lab? The lab to have blood drawn?

Man #1: Um, pathology?

Me: Yeah, um, you're on a psychiatry floor...I have no idea where pathology is.

Seriously, dude? You're gonna come into a random floor of a building called "Center for Health Sciences" and ask for the "laboratory" and expect to get where you need to be? There are a billion laboratories in this building!

Later...

2 young adults: Excuse me, could you help us? We're lost. We're looking for the nurses station.

Me: Which nurses station?

Them: Um, the nurses station? On the 2nd floor?

Me: Yeah, the 2nd floor is pretty big... Is it a psychiatry nurses station? There are 2 of them down this hall. But if it's not psychiatry, it could be in the other part of the building...

Them: We were just told to go to the 2nd floor and to the nurses station...

They proceed to hand me a card with directions to said nurses station. A card of directions that they have clearly ignored.

Me: Yeah, so, see here where it says you have to go to the 1st floor and take the O elevators to the 2nd floor? You didn't do that...

Them: No, but we went to the 2nd floor.

Me: No...that's why they made these directions really specific - specifying the O elevators... There are lots and lots of nurses stations in this building, but if you go to the O elevators, that should help. Go down to the 1st floor, then all the way down the hall to the O elevators, then take those up to the 2nd floor, and you should be set.

Male half of the duo: Or we could just go around...right?

Me: No, this floor of the building doesn't connect throughout. It's weird. Just follow the directions on the card.

Female: Ok.

Male (walking away and talking to female): Let's go this way, we can just go around. I know how to get there...

Seriously? Um, you clearly didn't know how to get there or else you wouldn't be asking me for help. Just follow the directions on the card!!

And then I shut my door.